Monday Mixer: Grandson, Alcohol, Pneumonia and No Work Zone

This weekend was a wonderful time for me and my husband. It had been eleven years since we had an overnight visit from our oldest grandson. Truly, we were both happy to have him as a guest in our home.

My Grandson

Robert is 20 years old now, and as a result of a family misunderstanding between me and his mother, I wasn’t able to visit my grandson as he was growing up.

I knew I had grandmother rights, but I didn’t want to push the issue and have the boys caught in between family drama. I wasn’t going to drag my grandson through a court battle just to win visitation.

So, I stayed away for more than six years. That cost me a hefty price all by itself, but my daughter eventually started questioning why I didn’t try to regain access to my grandchildren after several years had passed.

I dislike head games, and my daughter was the type of person who loved playing them. She thinks I stayed away because I didn’t care, which is far from the truth. I stayed away because I DID care.

Someone Needs Help

My daughter’s life has been spiraling out of control for more than ten years, and recently it has caused her to lose custody of her children, her home, and her self-respect.

But, she hasn’t sought any rehabilitation even though we’ve begged her to consider getting some. She hasn’t come to terms with her illness and feels she doesn’t need any professional intervention. So be it.

But this is another story for a future blog post.

All that matters is that my grandson wants to rebuild a relationship with me and my husband. We enjoyed his first visit. With any luck, there will be many more pleasurable gatherings.

Getting Sick

Grandpa took the boy home on Sunday afternoon. I didn’t feel well and complained that my body felt like a ton of cement blocks were crushing my chest.

By the next morning, I was coughing up mucus and running a slight fever. I could barely lift my head off the pillow and needed help getting to the bathroom.

There’s gurgling in my chest every time I breath, and a pounding sensation in my temple. Thank goodness for the oxygen machine at my bedside! I find it very hard to breath after the coughing subsides.

I’ve had double-lung pneumonia in the past, but I don’t think I’m quite there yet. As long as I can keep the mucus from building up in my lungs, I should be okay. Worst case scenario, I’ll head to the emergency room.

No Work Zone

Unfortunately, there’s no sense in trying to do any work while I am feeling like this. I can’t sit up for long periods of time, and I’m using Dragon Naturally Speaking to create this blog post.

Thankfully, the software works regardless if you’re sitting, standing or lying down in bed. I love the technological advancements we have today because we can keep in touch with others while we’re unhealthy!

Can you remember a time when you weren’t feeling up to par, but you still produced a blog post? How did you manage to stay in touch with your fans while you were feeling ill?

– OR –

Has anyone kept you from visiting your children or grandchildren? Leave a comment below and let me know!

Thanks for reading,
– Bonnie

P.S. Did you enjoy this message? If so, please share it with your friends so they can benefit from schmoozing. Then, if you want to get more messages like this one, connect with me via my social links below or hop aboard my notification list. I would like to keep in touch.

About Bonnie Gean

Bonnie is a full-time writer and marketer with over 20-years of experience as an entrepreneur. She loves helping people overcome the technical challenges associated with an online business. Need a step-by-step tutorial? Simply ASK her and she'll help you too.

Join the Discussion

  1. Hi Bonnie.

    How are you feeling now?

    Am curious about Dragon software.

    Is it really good? Does it have any glitches? Is it hard to use?

    Hoping to hear from you.

    Enjoy your weekend.

    Take care.

    Best wishes and regards.
    Veena Furtado
    Veena Furtado recently posted…How To Sell Fish Successfully On FacebookMy Profile

    • Hi Veena,

      I am doing much better now, Veena. Thank you for asking. :)

      Dragon Naturally Speaking software is a software bundle that you don’t realize you need until you no longer have it at your disposal. No matter how fast you can write the content, DNS can help you write it faster.

      You can train the software to understand your style of speaking so that you can dictate with it with ease. I LOVE the package, and I believe you will too. You just need to give it a try.

      I’ve worked with the program in the early stages of the software development, and there were glitches in earlier versions but not the latest version I am using.

      I can’t believe how the software helps me finish blog content, even when I am ill and can’t sit up long enough to type a few paragraphs. As long as you have access to a microphone and laptop (or PC), you can still work while you’re bedridden.

      If you have any questions about DNS, please don’t hesitate to contact me and let me know. I would seriously give the DNS software a try. You won’t regret it.

      Enjoy the rest of your week!

      – Bonnie

  2. Wow Bonnie, you’ve certainly had some highs and lows!

    I love it when things work out, especially with family and I hope your relationships, all round, go from strength to strength.

    And I hope that your health also improves! Rapidly!

    xox
    Tamsin recently posted…Are You Reliving The Past?My Profile

    • Hi Tamsin,

      Thanks, Tamsin! Things have a way of working out with family members. I learned that it helped to have great friends to see us through bad times.

      Thank you for being there.

      – Bonnie

  3. Hi Bonnie

    I can’t begin to imagine how not seeing your grandson for all those years made you feel. I don’t have grandchildren just yet. My daughter is just going on 19 yrs, and the thought of not seeing her for all those years breaks my heart. That must have been hard for you both.

    But hey, the past is the past and we have to focus on the present, right? and I’m delighted to hear your grandson stayed the night. At least now you can begin to build bridges, so to speak.

    Thank you for being so open about the challenges you’ve faced in life. Hope you’re feeling better.

    Thanks.
    Kerry
    Kerry Russell recently posted…December 2014 Monthly Report: 13% Revenue Growth, Anxious Times, Affiliate Program and MoreMy Profile

    • Hi Kerry,

      My daughter says it was hard to be apart from me and her father, but her actions say differently. Even today, a year later, she is not speaking to us again because we refused to bail her out of jail.

      Had she been in there from different circumstances, we may have considered it, but she chose to drink and drive. We felt it was best for the public if we didn’t allow her to make that decision again.

      So much for the present, eh?

      For now, we’re concentrating on building our relationship with our grandson since our daughter has decided to cut her son our of her life too. Her head is all messed up, and it is our hope that she gets back on track before it’s too late.

      I hope to have better news next time we talk. Enjoy your week.

      – Bonnie

  4. Hi Bonnie,

    Spending times with loved ones is great. Unfortunately for me, I don’t get the opportunity (or as much as I’d like) because they live in the Caribbean and I’m in Canada so …

    Yea, but when I do get to see them, I enjoy the time.

    So sorry to hear about you getting sick. I seriously hope you get better and feel better soon.

    Also, Dragon is pretty awesome. I tried it out before and it’s something I’ll be getting next month. Makes my life easier.

    – Andrew
    Andrew M. Warner recently posted…24 Bloggers Reveal Their Secret, Can’t-Fail Strategies To Effectively Generate Blog TopicsMy Profile

    • Hi Andrew,

      I bet it’s hard for you to live in Canada while your family is in the Caribbean. Was there a reason you moved without your family? Is it possible that they will be visiting you soon? I sure hope so.

      It’s not easy being miles and miles apart. I have family members who live in Pennsylvania. I live 520 miles away; too far from my sisters. I wish I could visit them as easily as walking across the street, but that’s not possible.

      I moved to Michigan to get away from a bad relationship and ended up meeting my future husband here. His job is in this state so it was hard for us to live anywhere else. Obviously, this means I am stuck 520 miles from my family in another state, but I wouldn’t trade my husband for the world!

      – Bonnie

  5. Well Bonnie, I’m SO glad your grandson wanted to stop by for a visit and actually stay the night. I’m sure you and your husband had such a great time with him and had so much to catch up on. I have no doubt he’ll want to return for another visit soon.

    I’m so sorry though that you got so sick. To have had double pneumonia, I can’t even imagine that. Bless your heart and I’m shocked you even got this post out. I’m a pretty miserable person when I’m sick.

    Normally my eyes water so much I couldn’t see the computer screen if you paid me. I can only imagine what my post, image and set up would look like if I tried to do it in that condition. Luckily for me I’ve gotten sick after the post already went live so I haven’t come across that yet. I say for that reason it’s worth skipping.

    I’m also sorry to hear about your daughter. Although I can’t relate to that I can relate to having a very close relative not speak to me for six years. Oh yeah, in my own immediate family too although it’s been years since that took place. I didn’t even do anything to warrant it but my pride wouldn’t let me apologize for something I didn’t do either. That was all resolved years ago finally and water under the bridge but not a pleasant time while going through it.

    I hope that for everyone’s sake that it all works out for the best. I admire that you stayed away because you did love your grandchildren because they are the last people who should be put in the middle of petty differences.

    I hope you’re better now and thanks for sharing this with us. Take care and have a good week.

    ~Adrienne
    Adrienne recently posted…Magical Monday: Blog Promotion, Loyal Audience, Your List, Triberr, SuccessMy Profile

    • Hi Adrienne,

      Yes, most people would look at the 20-year age and wonder why a grown man would want to spend overnight time with his grandparents. However, considering that this was the first time since he was nine years old… well, need I say more?

      I’m shocked I created a post in my condition, but considering I was in bed for an entire week; my bones just couldn’t take another minute in the horizontal position. I needed to sit up, although not for very long I’m afraid. :)

      Double pneumonia is wretched. You don’t want to experience that feeling in your lifetime; I guarantee it. You lose all control of your body functions. When you sneeze or cough, fluids seep from every hole in your body. SERIOUSLY… you couldn’t hold it in if you tried!

      RE: Staying Away for Six Years

      I had friends tell me to exercise my grandparent rights, but I just couldn’t see doing that to my grandbabies. They were too young to understand, and I’m sure my daughter told the kids anything to defend her decision.

      It’s sad that something like this had to happen. My daughter may have felt as if she was punishing me, but her children suffered too.

      No person has the right to deny a child the love or visitation from a parent or grandparent; unless it’s favorable for the child. The fact that it happens is truly an injustice to all parties involved.

      When I finally gained access to see them, she crucified me for not trying to gain access to them sooner. It was a no-win situation, but I won’t allow the past to dictate my future with the boys.

      Thanks for speaking with me! Have a nice day!

      – Bonnie

  6. Bonnie,

    What a blessing that your grandson came to see you! At 20, he is old enough to make his own decisions regarding who he wants to see when. I have a feeling he’ll be back!

    I’m sorry you aren’t feeling well, and I’m amazed you were still able to get a post up. I’m trying to read and respond to posts now with my heavy eyelids sinking low. I can’t think about writing a post…

    I’ll be praying you heal quickly!
    Carrie Ann Tripp ( recently posted…Dare: Move from Words to Action #1000SpeakMy Profile

    • Hi Carrie,

      Robert grew into a fine young man, and he loves his Nana. He is on his way to Florida with a long-time friend. He’s been texting me while his friend drives. :)

      I told him to send pictures along the way. He just sent a picture of his friend. The girls in Florida will have a load of fun when these men get there. Michigan sure does produce some fine looking guys.

      Thanks, Carrie. I’m feeling better and better as the days pass. I should be up and back to work full time within a week or so.

      Thanks for stopping by and enjoy your week!

      – Bonnie

  7. Hi Bonnie,
    I’m so sorry that you are sick. It’s really difficult when you have that kind of headache and mucous in your chest. I used to come down with sinus infections nearly every month when I lived overseas and went in and out of the air conditioning. My body didn’t like the drastic changes. But since I’ve come home, things are much better.
    I love that Dragon Software and may look into it when I find some extra money. It looks very helpful.
    So sorry about the time lost with your grandson. I haven’t had that happen but I have been separated by distance and you do miss a lot. So glad your reunion was positive!
    Amy
    Amy Bovaird recently posted…Encouragement Comes to a Blind/Deaf GalMy Profile

    • Hi Amy,

      My cousin had to move to a different state to gain easier breathing. It’s sad when you need to move away from friends and family just to be able to cope with health issues.

      Thankfully, I don’t need to move to gain better health but it’s still tough not being able to work, write or get out to the public while you’re sick.

      I’m glad to hear you are doing better since you moved away from the AC. How are you doing now?

      RE: Dragon Software

      Do try and grab a copy of the Dragon Naturally Speaking software. I know it’s tough when you’re short on cash, but if you ever find a stash of green available, do get a copy!

      Have a great day, Amy!

      – Bonnie
      Bonnie Gean recently posted…How to Protect Your Website Content from ThievesMy Profile

  8. So sorry that you’re not feeling well. Hope you feel better soon!
    I’ve never been prevented from being with my children, but I do completely understand that your actions come from love and not wanting to put your grandchildren in the middle of a conflict. It’s wonderful that you’re building a relationship with them now. Wishing you many beautiful times together as a family.

    • Hi Rachel,

      Every day goes by with a healing power. I’m getting stronger with each day passing, so thanks for your wellness prayers.

      Conflicts rarely end on a good note. I love my grandbabies (even though two of them are no longer children).

      Plus, my partner assured me that the children would come of age and seek us out, eventually. That may have been truth, but when my grandson was 9 years old – I knew the waiting patiently part would not come easy for me.

      Also, I didn’t like missing out on those wonderful years of report cards, summer vacation time together, and other dates of importance. (Birthdays, Christmas, etc.)

      Even now that we’re rebuilding the lost years, I can’t help but feel that I’ve missed out on a whopping amount of “turning points” in my grandson’s life. I’ll never be able to gain them back. :(

      Thanks for listening and sharing your insight, Rachel. Have a great day and hold your babies close, every day!

      – Bonnie
      Bonnie Gean recently posted…How to Protect Your Website Content from ThievesMy Profile

  9. Hi Bonnie – just a quick note to wish you well, get better soon!

    So pleased you got to spend time with your grandson :) It’s brilliant that he’s looking to rebuild a relationship with you both. Here’s to many more visits in the future!

    Just to answer your question, if I’m ill ill (as in pain) then blogging or any work is the last thing on my mind. I tend to find a quiet place to curl up and recover.
    Jan Kearney recently posted…Learn Local Keyword Research In 3 Minutes [Video]My Profile

    • Hi Jan,

      Thanks for wishing me a speedy recovery.

      We were teasing our grandson, telling him that PopPop wanted to move out of state to a warmer climate. Robert said, “you’re taking me with you if you go!” I thought that was so cute! :)

      – Bonnie

  10. Hope you get well soon :)
    Anmol Rawat recently posted…An Abundance of Katherines (John Green) – ReviewMy Profile

  11. Bonnie, I sure hope you’re on the road to recovery. Good thing you weren’t sick when your grandson was visiting. It sounds like you had a nice time and I’m sure he’s glad to be back in your life.
    I never tried Dragon Naturally Speaking. What a great resource!
    Thanks.
    Barbara recently posted…Apple-Filled Pumpkin Crepes with Coconut Whipped CreamMy Profile

    • Hi Barbara,

      I wasn’t sick while my grandson was visiting, but when he found out that I had fallen ill after he left, he asked to come back so he could take care of me. That was an emotional moment for this Nana. :)

      – Bonnie

  12. I wish you all the best reconnecting with your grandson, he’s very fortunate to have grandparents who care and love, no matter what.
    Susan recently posted…How To Uncover Your PassionsMy Profile

    • Hi Susan,

      I can’t express how good it feels to be able to hug and kiss my grandson; especially after so many years have passed between us.

      Robert was my daughter’s first born, so he holds a special place in our hearts. My other two grandsons are just as precious, but the firstborn forms a special bond DEEP in the heart. To be able to hold him close now, is truly a moment worth savoring. :)

      He is traveling to Florida with his friend for a short vacation, and once he returns back home, we intend to spend more quality time together.

      Do you have any children or grandchildren, Susan?

      – Bonnie
      Bonnie Gean recently posted…How to Protect Your Website Content from ThievesMy Profile

  13. Hi Bonnie! I’ve left two comments on Facebook for you. Firstly, I do hope you’re feeling better soon and please seek treatment when necessary.

    Glad to hear you spent time with your grandson. I don’t have any grandkids, but I do have a stepson who’s family has intervened and done some horrible things in the recent past as I still mourned the passing of my mother.

    People can be so selfish. I don’t hate anyone. My mother told me to never use that word or carry those feelings, but I do hate selfishness. I honestly don’t understand how a person can only think of themselves, but so is life.

    I’ve had things to get in the way of me blogging and being active online. At those times, I didn’t have the mental energy to do much of anything in efforts of sharing or helping someone else.

    That Dragon Naturally speaking sounds like a great tool to have for occasions such as this. I enjoyed this post. It’s personal, but allows me to get a glimpse of your world and makes me feel closer to you.

    Take care of yourself friend and know that you are loved. I hope you’re feeling better real soon.
    Cynthia Dixon recently posted…Is it really better to drive traffic to my websiteMy Profile

    • Hi Cynthia,

      I’m sorry you miss your mother. I miss my father too, even though he passed nine years ago. It’s not easy getting over the passing of parents. I lost my mom 31 years ago (when I was 24) and I am still mourning her. We fought the week she died. I had to apologize to her on the side of her coffin. I haven’t been the same since. (I’m sure you read that post.)

      I dislike people who think they can on a throne and pass judgment to other family members. Such is life, I guess. My parents always said, “what goes around, comes around” so every dog has his day.

      I did notice that you weren’t online or blogging much. I believe it was because you found your mojo and busy with fulfilling customer orders for videos. But it doesn’t sound like that was the case.

      Don’t you have Dragon Naturally Speaking, Cynthia? I thought you used the program too. Well, if you ever get the chance to use it, I’m sure you’ll like it.

      Try to stay in touch. I miss hearing from you and the others I met through Tiffany’s very first video blogging challenge. I feel so close to everybody that participated and feel empty now that we lost touch with each other.

      – Bonnie
      Bonnie Gean recently posted…How to Start a Business You Love by Changing Your FocusMy Profile

  14. So sorry to hear that you are unwell Bonnie. I hope that you are taking it easy and that you get better soon.

    Happy to hear that your Grandson reached out to you and was willing to reconnect. Great that you can build up that relationship on your (and his) terms, without battling with your daughter.

    Take care Bonnie :)
    Victoria Virgo recently posted…January 2015 Review & Income ReportMy Profile

    • Hi Victoria,

      It’s been a while since I had pneumonia, but I feel much better now and thank you for being concerned.

      My grandson has been spending weekends with us since I wrote this blog post, and he has fallen out of contact with his mother since then too. Granted, not on his initiative, but hers. So be it. One day she will wake up and realize the ‘good things’ that are missing from her life. Hopefully soon, before it’s too late.

      How has life been treating you? I don’t hear much from you lately. What have you been doing with yourself? How’s business? Are you still creating videos?

      – Bonnie
      Bonnie Gean recently posted…How to Start a Business You Love by Changing Your FocusMy Profile

  15. Hey Bonnie,

    I’m so glad you were able to spend time with your grandson, but I’m so sorry that you got sick. My son has had double pneumonia twice, and I can picture how very sick you were.

    Your description of the dilemma in your family really does show your heart because I fully understand what you’re saying about being misunderstood, and I’m sorry you had to go through that.

    Absolutely not. There’s no way you could’ve worked, but I can relate to what you’re saying about the blessings of technology. I use the built in voice recognition software on my MacBook Pro and absolutely love it. Very little editing is needed, and it’s so much faster than typing.

    The only thing that I have to edit usually is if I pause too long after punctuation or a comma, the next word is capitalized and that irks me. Spoiled? Just a tad…

    I’m surprised you didn’t put your Dragon NaturallySpeaking affiliate link in your post. I used to when I was on the PC. However, I do realize you’ve been sick so fully understand.

    Hope you’re completely on the mend, my friend, and have a restful weekend.

    ˜Carol
    Carol Amato recently posted…Is PLR Trash or Treasure?My Profile

    • Hi Carol,

      I can attest, along with your suspicions, that I was very sick! My partner, the poor thing, was working at his JOB and taking care of me on his lunch breaks, and after the end of his workdays too.

      My desktop looked like a pharmacy. I didn’t have the strength to change out of my nightwear. And I couldn’t cook dinners for the hubby for the entire week. I feel bad for that. :(

      Thank you, Carol. I’m used to being “played” by my daughter. Sad, but true. One day she’ll realize just how good I treated her, and then it will be too late because I’ll be six feet under.

      RE: Voice Recognition

      Thank you for reminding me that I didn’t include an affiliate link for Dragon Naturally Speaking. I fixed that right after I read your comment. :)

      That’s the beauty of DNS because even with a stuffed nose, I didn’t have to edit a thing! The only downfall I have considering the software is that I don’t use it as often as I should (to save typing time).

      Thanks for stopping by, Carol. I know you’re busy helping your daughter move, so I know your time is limited too.

      – Bonnie

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